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. Sparking Outrage since 2000 (with a few lost years in between)

Sunday, August 29, 2010


YAMS can today exclusively reveal that Preston North End cunt, Maurice Lindsay has left the UK for San Jose in Chile.

Whilst looking for him to hear his reaction to yesterdays Carling Cup draw, YAMS discovered Lindsay at Manchester airport being questioned by Customs for a large tub of lube he was attempting to smuggle onto his flight.

"I hear there are several trapped and helpless minors" said Lindsay when questioned by YAMS.

Lindsey has a history of overseas trips to search out minors to groom. His most successful trips were to Australia in the 80's and 90's where hundreds of young Aussie boys were raped in a highly productive period for Mo.

"What excites me most about this" said the Nob end leech "is that from what I've read in the papers, the minors are desperate for someone to go down their shaft. They've been waiting for someone to do it for a couple of weeks now, they must be gagging for it. I'm more than happy to oblige. I'll let them go up and down my shaft as well if they're lucky."

YAMS then broke the sad news to Lindsay that it wasn't a group of young boys looking for sex but actually a new series of Chilean Big Brother.

"Oh I see" minced Lindsay as he looked at our video footage of the Reality TV contestants. "They're a bit old for me really but the site of their topless hot sweaty bodies is giving me a hard on so I'm going over regardless. I hear the age of consent is 12 over there anyway. Not as though age of consent has ever stopped me before LOL"

Preston North End were unavailable for comment as YAMS went to press as they were too busy crying about Manchester nicking the football museum.

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