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Friday, October 15, 2010

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By YAMS Reporter

Wigan council have once again fuelled tension which has reached breaking point between the fans of Wigan Athletic and Wigan Worriers.

The latest round of antagonism has started after the rugby club’s first Super League title win for 12 years in an unusual row over signposts.

The local council responded to Wigan's win by putting new signs reading "Wigan Worriors Super League champions 2010" underneath "Welcome to Wigan" on three approaches to the town. However, Wigan Athletic supporters were having none of that, and harangued the council who have now been forced to replaced the old signs, which describe Wigan as "home of Premiership football and Super League rugby", underneath.

And in a further twist to the story, one of the new signs has been spray painted blue, the colours of the football club, leading to accusations of childishness by supporters of the rugby and members of the council.

"It's an absolute disgrace," unconcerned bystander, Ernie Tusk, told the Wigan Rugby Post as he was moidered mercilessly for a comment. “I blame Halfords” he said.
However, Reg “Chubbie” Arsehole, the council's head of anti-latics propaganda, said: "We are proud of the Warriors' recent success and Latics' can go and fuck themselves. We have therefore added new plates where there weren't any at all. When asked about the blue paint on his hands and shirt cuffs he muttered, “I knew I should have worn gloves before adding, can I go now because Aldi have got lard on special offer and I don’t want to miss out”.

Darren Pott-Bellie a Worriers fan from Scholes said “Them Latics men are soft cunts and they’re dead bitter and they should be in’t League 2 and they can’t fill the ground against Man Utd and they have no history and they had to name a stand after that shithole of a ground they used to play at and we’ve had 25,000 on every game this season and we own the DW Stadium and we keep Latics afloat”.

Before this reporter left Mr. Pott-Bellie went red in the face and spontaneously combusted.